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Jul. 1st, 2009 @ 05:19 pm Well, this looks pretty good.
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DC just put up in their blog a preview of Adventure Comics #1 starring Superboy (Kon-El).

Actually seems like fun. The art is not bad, but the guy should work more on his facial expressions. Everything else looks nice but Kon-El has this combination of exasperation and zombie on his face. Like the weight of ennui has crushed his spirit, leaving behind a pitiful mockery of a man filled with impotent hate for existence.

I don't think that's what the script was going for.
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Ponder
May. 22nd, 2009 @ 04:39 pm I weep for humanity.
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According to some... people... the ending of Battle for the Cowl is confusing. They can't figure out who is the new Batman.

In order to help, I just read the last issue to solve this mystery. The book ends with Dick Grayson saying "Yeah, I'm Batman now."

I think that was a clue.

I guess people didn't notice Morrison was not the writer and they forgot to turn off their "Oh My God! Nobody can understand this!" autopilot.
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Frustrated
May. 5th, 2009 @ 05:46 pm In retrospect...
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In retrospect, I was writing about Catwoman's origin while still angry, and I shouldn't write while angry, and two of the pieces of text I quoted might not be as angering as I though. They are still very much wrong as wrong can be, but not wrong in any way that angers me.

These two, on the other hand?

"can't reconcile Selina ever having been a prostitute, given her very independent nature."

"I could never reconcile this tough slum living prostitute with the high life living Selina."


These two still piss me off with their awful ignorance.
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Frustrated
May. 4th, 2009 @ 03:24 pm Why do you hate prostitutes, people?
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Scans_Daily seems to be going through a phase of love for Catwoman with a bunch of posts dedicated to her. Actually, it might be just one guy or gal doing all the posts; I am too lazy to check who is posting all that stuff, but the point is still the same.

One of the posts caught my eye because it contained some scans from Catwoman’s youth. I think this was some issue where Doug Moench tried to retcon out or at least downplay the origin story Frank “WHORES WHORES WHORES” Miller gave Catwoman in Batman Year One, where Catwoman was a common prostitute who one day puts on a catsuit and starts stealing stuff, because it was more fun and lucrative than being a prostitute.

What I want to ask is why people hate the prostitute origin story? Is it so bad that Catwoman was once a prostitute? Really? Street prostitutes are not allowed to leave their harsh life behind and start having superhero adventures with Batman? Batman can’t love a former prostitute? Is getting a dick in your vagina so tainting?

I don’t think these people are being entirely misogynistic, but only because there are no male prostitute characters to compare with Catwoman. Other than Booster Gold, of course. But Booster Gold whoring himself for money with old women was played for laughs. I’m not sure he counts for our purposes. In any case, I’ll give people the benefit of the doubt and pretend this is about sexphobia and not misogyny.

I wouldn’t call myself a fan of the prostitute origin, but I can see a big silver lining in it. Catwoman didn’t like being a prostitute, and I can easily see why, but then she saw this goofy guy in a bat costume having a more awesome life and she said “Hey! If that moron can do it, why can’t I do it?” And then she became a glamorous cat burglar by her own hand. You know what? I take that back, I am a fan of the prostitute origin. There, I said it!

Despite my better judgment I read some of the reasons why some people hate this origin, and frankly I don’t think these people are as progressive or enlightened as they seem to think. I am not putting their names, or bothered to read who said what, but you can check then out in the link above if you want to. And yes, these are from several different people.

“But in the end I just don't buy it as an origin for the world's greatest thief. That's the main thing with me. Selina is the absolute best thief in the world, bar none, and an amazing athlete as well. She's good enough at what she does that I feel she has to have been working at it for all or most of her life. I just don't buy that any significant period in her past was spent as a prostitute”

This one is insulting. Sorry, hos! You can never be the best at anything, it’s because of all the dicks you sucked. Frowny face :(. Sorry, it’s all your fault for whoring too much and not practicing other stuff!

For the life of me, I can’t understand how anyone can even bring this logic to a fictional world where Green Arrow is just a trust fund baby who one day picked up a bow and became the best archer in the world; where Batman is the master of whatever the heck he decides to be; where Oracle is the best hacked despite that she is a Librarian and an English major and not a computer engineer.

Why can’t a prostitute be a great thief? Oh yes… the dicks.

can't reconcile Selina ever having been a prostitute, given her very independent nature.

Sorry, Catwoman, you can’t be an independent woman. It’s because of all the dicks you sucked. Frowny face to you, Catwoman!

I could never reconcile this tough slum living prostitute with the high life living Selina.

Sorry, Catwoman, you can’t buy pretty things with the money you stole. It’s because of all the dicks you sucked. Frowny face, Catty, frowny face!

Selina as a prostitute is utter fail because it is simply bad storytelling. It does not make sense! Selina is a cat burglar. Prostitute to cat burglar is no way a logical shift.

Sorry, Catwoman, you can’t become a thief. It’s because of all the dicks you sucked. Frowny face.

Okay, this is getting repetitive. Let’s find a different take on that. Oh, here is one:

For me, Catwoman as a prostitute offends me mostly because Frank Miller was the creator of the idea. It's technically an interesting, innovative idea, but it can feel a little cheap, because Miller makes all of his women whores. There was no imagination involved in his decision for Selina's profession; he made the same decision he makes everytime he writes a female character.

This might surprise people, but Miller has written female characters who were not prostitutes. I know, it’s amazing, but it’s true. I saw it in a rerun of THAT’S INCREDIBLE!

But again, I have to ask, why are people offended by Miller writing about prostitutes? Oh, I don’t mind the whores! I mind Miller writing about whores. Well, why?

Am I again being mean to people, or maybe these people are being sexphobic?
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Sad
Apr. 27th, 2009 @ 04:53 pm 52... done right! *snicker*
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This is from an interview to Mark Waid.

[On “52"] EIC Dan Didio, who first championed the concept, hated what we were doing. H-A-T-E-D ‘52.’ Would storm up and down the halls telling everyone how much he hated it. And Steve [Wacker, editor], God bless him, kept us out of the loop on that particular drama. Siglain, having less seniority, was less able to do so, and there's one issue of ‘52’ near the end that was written almost totally by Dan and Keith Giffen because none of the writers could plot it to Dan's satisfaction. Which was and is his prerogative as EIC, but man, there's little more demoralizing than taking the ball down to the one-yard line and then being benched by the guy who kept referring to ‘Countdown’ as ‘52 done right.’

Now, remember this is Waid's version... but still. Funny, in its way.
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Frustrated
Apr. 19th, 2009 @ 11:05 pm TINY RACISM!
Tags: , ,


Why are you so racist, Beast Boy?
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Frustrated
Apr. 13th, 2009 @ 11:21 pm REVIEWS FOR APRIL 13, 2009
Okay, let’s review stuff today.

Today we got the Wonder Woman animated movie, Teen Titans Annual 2009, Batman: Battle for the Cowl #2, Seaguy: Slaves of Mickey Eye #1, and Doctor Doom and the Masters of Evil #3.

All that and more... well, not more... after the cut!... )
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Opinion
Apr. 7th, 2009 @ 11:36 am No, God, leave that Galaxy alone!
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A friend sent me a link to this:

Pulsar Creates Cosmic "Hand"



Are you there, God? It's me, Cissie. Can you please stop moving galaxies around with your giant, spooky blue hand? It creeps me out.

Wait, I have seen this before!  )
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WTF
Mar. 31st, 2009 @ 12:26 am Teen Titans, JLA, GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER!
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These are not really reviews; they are more like just side commentary about Teen Titans and JLA. I don't like to write posts to just complain and complain, and I know I have complained over and over and over and over again about Teen Titans being the cemetery of happiness and JLA just being really pointless. But I can't help it today! I just can't, because the bastards are taunting me! TAUNTING ME! You'll see.

Really, it's like the perfect storm of metacommentary, when both Teen titans and JLA explain why they are sucking so hard right now.

The suckitude of Teen Titans and JLA behind the cut... )
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Frustrated
Mar. 18th, 2009 @ 09:40 pm So... McKeever is leaving Teen Titans.
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When McKeever was announced as Geoff Johns successor at the helm of Teen Titans, fans, who didn't like the all tears and dismemberment motif the series had at the time, received the news with the joy fat people usually reserve for news like "Free hamburgers fired right into your home and your mouth with Mcdonalds' new atomic catapult!" Mostly because McKeever had written a few teenage heroes at Marvel who didn't suffer massive body trauma and whined a lot in every issue. Although I personally thought Gravity was at least eight kinds of boring, so I didn't go crazy with the news. But, I thought at least it would result in a less miserable Teen Titans book.

A few months later and any hope that Teen Titans was going to be all smiles, kisses and hugs died of a quadruple heart attack, fell out of a window and was gang banged by a troupe of marauding necrophiliacs. And then hit by thunder, and then a dog passed by and peed on the ashes. And then the dog came back and did it again. McKeever kept the ship steady as it goes and the U.S.S. Teen Titans kept venturing farther and farther into the waters of Misery, which as legend tells us was formed by the tears of children who were told there was no Santa Claus, and the tears of people who bought all of Countdown because they had been told it was going to matter. Teen Titans' contribution to the museum of retarded decadence of superhero comics were several pages of Marvin and Wendy from Superfriends being mawled to death by Wonder Dog. A crass scene akin to Smurfette prostituting herself for crack, Yogi Bear dying of auto-erotic asphyxiation, or whatever depravity some maladjusted manchild who watched cartoons from the 70s want to see happen.

McKeever has announced he will no longer be the writer of Teen Titans after issue 71, except for the Ravager backup feature. As expected, NoScans-Daily is celebrating this. I'm not. Whoever writes it after McKeever is not going to change things simply because the editor of Teen Titans doesn't want to change things. And the editor of Teen Titans is Dan Didio, so nobody is going to tell him to give it up. Now, if you bother to remember, Dan Didio canceled Young Justice to start the current volume of Teen Titans. Dan Didio believed and probably still believes that a book starring Robin, Wondergirl, Superboy and Impulse / Kid flash should be one of the flagship titles of DC and one of its biggest sellers. Young Justice of course was neither, and to be entirely candid Dan Didio's idea is not completely without merit. Of course I loved Young Justice, but leaving bias aside you can see that with those four characters there was the possibility and potential of bringing back the days of the Wolfman and Perez Teen Titans, which competed in sales with X-Men... which in those days sold more than it does now. But I am not DC, just a reader. I care about what I want to read and not about maximizing DC's sales. That's not my problem, but it's nice to see the point of view of DC and why they did what they did. It's a better idea than thinking that DC does what it does to hurt you personally because they hate you because you smell.

So, did Teen Titans set the charts on fire? Well, no. It sells okay and it is in no danger of cancellation but hardly the second coming. If I were Peter David, I would send Dan Didio photocopies of my butt by fax every day just for that. Also, if the idea was to take advantage of having big name sidekicks / fourth generation heroes in one team, then killing Superboy and Kid Flash was kind of retarded, wasn't it? Just saying. Because I don't think that helped.

The problem with Teen Titans is that it became the book where happiness went to die. Like an elephant cemetery of big happy thoughts where gentle giants coughed and then collapsed to never rise again.

I have noticed my writing in this post is like a beatnik novel... but stupid. I blame my mom's vodka.

And now back to the topic. Teen Titans was not completely impossible to enjoy. It was like scratching one's butt: pleasurable but not particularly thrilling. But the problem was the almost endless stream of misery and shock and awe tactics used. The book felt awkward to read. Marvin and Wendy bitten to pieces by Wonder Dog is the kind of thing I expect to see as a one page joke in an issue of Ambush Bug, not as several pages of horror and as the start of a plot thread. You know why? Because I can't take it seriously, just like I can't take a story about Darkwing Duck fighting AIDS. It's just ridiculous and the kind of thing one only sees in fanfics written by manchildren who want to see their cartoons as grim and gritty pieces of misery, because that's "mature" and "serious" and they are "mature" and "serious" people... in their crazy heads.

Nobody wants to see Teen Titans like Tiny Titans, or at least nobody worth listening to, but at some point the book needs to grow up and learn that it doesn't need to be serious all the time, or at least not the way immature people think "serious business" should be, which are usually childish, self-important and very stupid.

Leaving that aside, there were parts of McKeevers Teen Titans I actually liked. Otherwise I would have stopped reading it and I wouldn't even be writing this. McKeever actually made m care for Kid Devil. At least in the way one cares for a retarded, smelly puppy who keeps running and hitting his head against the walls and makes you wonder if euthanasia can actually improve him. But it's a form of caring. He also made me like Rose... not enough to read the horrible Terror Titans to the end, but I like Rose, crazy psycho bitch that she is. I will even dare and say that in the last few issues the team actually got... happier? I think it did. Perhaps because Robin left and he is a bit of a downer.

So, thought?
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Opinion
Mar. 4th, 2009 @ 12:04 pm Aquaman stole my name!
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Got this picture from What were they thinking?



You are NOT C. King! I am C. King!

Aquaman stole my name to make a horrible pun. :(
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Sad
Feb. 23rd, 2009 @ 07:28 pm (no subject)


Using: http://obamiconme.pastemagazine.com/







The stupid colors are hard to get right.
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Ponder
Feb. 6th, 2009 @ 03:23 pm REVIEWS FOR FEBRUARY 5, 2009.
Current Music: The Pipettes - Because It's Not Love(But It's Still A Feeling)
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I haven't written any reviews in quite a while. I just got behind in my reading and I don't like reviewing stuff three weeks after everyone stopped caring. And it's annoying because I had stuff to say about comics that came out three weeks ago. I don't remember what, but I knew I had something to say! I KNEW IT!

Reviews for Final Crisis #7, Mister X: Condemned #2, Batman Brave and the Bold #1, and Crossed #3 after the cut )
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Opinion
Jan. 24th, 2009 @ 03:05 am Meme thing!
Blame Gail Simone and [info]museofspeed for this meme thing.

Superhero puberty in eight words or less: Tampon-arrow? I'm not sticking that there, mom!

Six words or less, Any superhero's post-coital statement without cursing: "... that was great. Now go to sleep, tomorrow is a school night. Want the nightlight on?" -- Deathstroke. Yes, so wrong, so wrong... I know, I know.

A complete story in one Twitter post, featuring comic characters, without the use of the letter 'e': Iron-Man and Orphan fight without pants for Doop's brain! (I so miss Milligan's X-Statix)
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I win!
May. 20th, 2008 @ 12:02 am DC Solicitations for August 2008.
The solicitations just came out, so let’s see what DC has brought us this time.

Lots of pictures after the cut... )
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Ponder
May. 17th, 2008 @ 11:00 pm REVIEWS for May 17.
Current Mood: productive
Current Music: POLYSICS - ELECTRIC SURFIN' GO GO
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I haven’t done these for a while. So, assuming I still got readers interested in my opinion about comics that came out a few days ago, let’s try to catch up with this and last week’s batch.

This week we go through Wildcards #2, Titans #2, House of Mystery #1 and Omega the Unknown #8.

All that and more! Okay... just that, sorry... )
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Opinion
May. 15th, 2008 @ 12:07 am What the hell, Internet?!?
Current Mood: aggravated
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I was reading this post at scans_daily; someone had posted some pages from the Final Crisis sketchbook. So far so good. And then it suddenly became a rancid wankfest of the kind that punches you in the eyes with incoherent, insane whinery.

I don’t like to use my LJ tubes thing to complain, even though I do that plenty, so scratch this entire line. Is it wanky to complain that people are wanky? Probably, but I blame other people’s dumbness for making me wanky right now.

At this point, there are two types of wank going on in that post.

The first and more common, the group of people who have to do Nightwing level acrobatics to miss the point. There are people complaining that the members of Super Young Team just sound like wannabes with ridiculous names. This is probably the same type of ultrawankers who complain that Ambush Bug is not a serious character reeking with pathos, and that Punisher is kinda violent and not a peaceful, compassionate man. But ok, you can’t have a gene pool without some urine in it. This level of stupidity I can understand, even I have been known to dwell in it from time to time. Not often, and if you ask me again I’ll completely deny I even wrote this.

The second one completely confuses me. Apparently, the new Japanese superheroes are offensive. Apparently, a bunch of homages to actual Japanese characters are offensive. According to these morons that makes them stereotypes. If the characters were called Three-Inches-Penis-Man, High-Suicide-Rate-Lass, and Epileptic-Cartoon-boy then now you do have some offensive Japanese stereotypes there. But of course, those characters do not exist. What appear in the sketchbook are homages to heroes that exist in Japanese culture. Are you people so obtuse that you can’t figure out the difference between cultural stereotypes and fictional icons? If you had asked me yesterday if it was possible to confuse the two concepts, I would have punched you in the face for wasting my time asking me dumb questions, but apparently the Cissie of yesterday was wrong, oh so very wrong.

There are three Japanese teams in the sketchbook, but the one getting the most flak is Super Young Team. Not only are they being attacked by the usual humorless point-missers, but also by the short-bus faction of the PC police that give political correctness a bad name. Super Young Team is obviously a group of shallow fashionistas who like to mix and match costumes of western superheroes for the heck of it. Apparently, simply because they are not paragons of virtue and an example for young men and women around the world, that somehow makes them offensive. Apparently, writing a character as anything less than the reincarnation of Saint Ambolopheus, holy patron of sporks and toothpicks of Molobonia, is offensive to whatever group that character belongs to. I have a question for the people who think Super Young Team is offensive, How the hell did you survive out of the protective womb of your mother for so long you GIGANTIC WUSSY?

If Super Young Team were the only superhero team in Japan, the whiners would have some sort of point, but it isn’t, it’s one of three. The other two are actually more noble.

It’s not that Morrison is without fault, he is no St. Ambolopheus either. Mother of Champions still makes me queasy, but that’s no reason to wank like it’s the freaking Wankolympics about complaints, that if you ask me, are really stupid. And you should ask me, cause I am always right.
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Arrowette
May. 6th, 2008 @ 10:57 pm FANFIC: Be a man; dress like a woman
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Title: Be a man; dress like a woman.

Characters: Tim, Cissie, Kon, Bart, Cassie.

Rating: G

Word Count: 1682

Disclaimer: As you may have already guessed, I am not DC Comics incorporated.

Notes: Written for [info]shannanagin for crossdressing month. She didn’t ask for Kon-el fanfics specifically, but I wanted to kill two birds with one stone here. So enjoy.

“Yes, yes, that’s very noble of you,” said Kon with the same composure of a sedated Buddha he had shown during the entire conversation. “But what I still can’t understand is why the hell I have to go dressed like a woman?” )
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Arrowette
May. 5th, 2008 @ 11:10 pm Dan Didio's Mysterious Whiteboard of Mysterious Mysteries and Mysteriousness.
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As one of DC’s most important characters, people are always asking me to spill the beans on the inner workings and conspiracies inside the DC offices. The latest mystery is, of course, Didio’s super whiteboard of mysterious mystery! I am going to explain all the clues from the whiteboard as best as I can. Mind you, I can only repeat what the people more important around the Dc offices than me knows, like the Canine Space Patrol and G.I.Robot who told me all these things.

Answers to Mysteries behind the cut... )
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Arrowette
Apr. 21st, 2008 @ 01:07 am Well, now that's a relief.
Current Mood: relieved
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From the latest Final Crisis Panel in NYCC.

Morrison talked about how much he enjoyed writing Supergirl in Final Crisis, saying he took a cue from Jessica Abel and Dylan Horrocks’ version of the character in DC’s first Bizarro anthology. “It was the best Supergirl story I ever read,” Morrison said. “Greatest Supergirl ever. I kind of took my cue from that. she’s just really nice. A shining example of young women.” 
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Arrowette

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